If you are twenty-four and living in Happy Valley Utah you are considered "old". Maybe not "spinster" old yet but give it a couple more years and you might as well buy some cats move into a little pink cottage and take up knitting.
So if you are nearing the age of knitting needles and fur covering every surface of your house, all the people that know you decide it is their personal duty to find you a man. He doesn't have to be cute, intelligent, interesting, or even that likable. As long as he is male, breathing, and single he is "Perfect". Hence the invention of the Blind Date.
Oh yes. The wonderful creation that makes everyone feel like they can be a Yenta. For those of you not familiar with this term it is a Jewish woman who matches up people to be married.
I have sadly been the recipient of these more often then any one person should.
Older, younger, taller, shorter, boring, crazy, scary, dull you name it I've dated it. There have been a few good ones, but that is the exception not the rule. The majority of these dates have been terrible. I have learned to develop an attitude of amusement. If a date is bad then I make it into an entertaining story later on. Bad date stories are always crowd pleasers at a party.
But bad dates are not the real problem. The annoying weird man you had to endure a few hours with isn't nearly as bad as telling the third party who brought you two together that you really have no desire to ever see their relation, best friend, husband's brother, etc. ever again. How do you ever tactfully tell someone that you have no interest in this person that they clearly like?
Or by chance you go out with their relation, best friend, husband's brother, etc. and you do enjoy yourself, then they are invested in your relationship.
This is in many ways worse then telling them you are not interested. Because now they are going to see that, and they are going to work harder to push you in the direction of white dresses and tuxes.
"So and so really loves surprise texts! You should text him!"
"So and so would love you to make him some cookies! I have recipe you should make it!"
"So and so would love a hand written letter! You should write him one!"
"So and so would love the moon why don't you fly up there and bring it down for him!"
Okay the last one was a bit extreme but you get the gist. Perhaps some people actually enjoy being told how to please someone. Perhaps they like advice on how to go forward in a relationship. But I am not a puppet I need no puppeteer. I have been independently thinking, taking care of my self, and existing for many years.
I have never been one for advice. I don't ask for it because I won't take it and I don't want to hurt people's feelings when I refuse advice. So by not asking for it I am clearly showing that I can do it myself. Even if I can't. But then if I can't well then there is no one to blame but me.
There are two out comes with getting advice:
1. It doesn't work and you wind up looking stupid. You not them.
2. It does work and the advice giver patronizes you with that "look I was right" speech.
Thanks but no thanks. I was born a real person not a puppet and I will handle my own relationships on my own. After all bicycles were only made with two wheels you add a third and it disrupts the balance. Relationships will never work if the third party insists on being part of it. You brought us together we had a good time now back off and let us handle things from here. If we marry and have ten children then we will remember you in the wedding toast. If we break up in two weeks we will just chalk it up to another failed attempt. But either way I can handle this WITHOUT the extra input!
Sunday, March 3, 2013
Wednesday, September 12, 2012
Choosing Life
When it comes to politics it's safe to say I don't know a whole lot. I don't understand every issue that comes up in political debates. To be honest I don't always care to know everything. Maybe that makes me less of an American citizen, though I would hope not. Because the few things I do feel strongly about I try to make the best decision to vote for the person who will full fill my hopes for those things. In other words I would vote for a person over a party. A moral and decent person is more important to me then smooth words or an impressive resume.
One of those things I feel strongly about is the issue of Pro-Life vs. Pro-Choice. I have always been in favor of Pro-Life. Perhaps it is my Christian upbringing, or my inability to hurt anything or anyone, or perhaps I am extrememly sensitive. Whatever the deep seeded reasons I cannot understand why anyone who had a life growing inside of them could choose to end that life. People rationalize that it's only a "fetus" and that it is not a person yet and you are not ending any life just removing tissue. This is not true. I don't care how you put it or how scientific you want to become, the issue is that this is a potential human being that has been created and by "removing it" you are ending something prematurely. That something is called life.
There was a movie made recently called October Baby. It's a story of a girl that discovers she is the product of a failed abortion. She finds out all of this during her freshmen year of college. The story is remarkable of how this girl learns to deal with the lies she has been told her whole life and also how she learns to love herself after knowing she wasn't wanted. She also learns to forgive. Forgive her parents for not telling her the truth, forgive her birth mother for not wanting her, and forgive herself for the hatred she feels towards herself.
It's a beautiful story about the life of a girl who wasn't supposed to live. It makes you realize that you never know what potential a life could have.
What is even more interesting is during the end credits the actress who plays the birth mother tells how she did have an abortion and how she has carried guilt with her for years. She tells that how during one scene the tears she was crying were real and how she was finally able to forgive herself for everything she has felt for years.
The one thing that I loved about this movie is that even though it was clearly Pro-Life it didn't condem those who had chosen abortion. There was a line from the movie where a character said, "You hate the crime not the criminal." Meaning that we should still love those who hurt us or who choose a wrong path even if we don't agree with that choice.
A beautiful song plays during the end credits that mentioned all the small things that a person experiences in life that make up the bigger picture. I listened to it and thought about all those little things that I have felt and done and how beautiful even my fairly boring regular life is. It makes me wonder why anyone would be selfish enough to choose abortion over giving life. No matter how inconvienient a child may be during your life at that time, you should never let a life be prematurely ended especially when so many couples try to have a child and can't.
Life is beautiful and wonderful and precious. Each person has so much potential and so much that they will do and see and live. I wish that people could see that and stop the whole practice of abortion.
One of those things I feel strongly about is the issue of Pro-Life vs. Pro-Choice. I have always been in favor of Pro-Life. Perhaps it is my Christian upbringing, or my inability to hurt anything or anyone, or perhaps I am extrememly sensitive. Whatever the deep seeded reasons I cannot understand why anyone who had a life growing inside of them could choose to end that life. People rationalize that it's only a "fetus" and that it is not a person yet and you are not ending any life just removing tissue. This is not true. I don't care how you put it or how scientific you want to become, the issue is that this is a potential human being that has been created and by "removing it" you are ending something prematurely. That something is called life.
There was a movie made recently called October Baby. It's a story of a girl that discovers she is the product of a failed abortion. She finds out all of this during her freshmen year of college. The story is remarkable of how this girl learns to deal with the lies she has been told her whole life and also how she learns to love herself after knowing she wasn't wanted. She also learns to forgive. Forgive her parents for not telling her the truth, forgive her birth mother for not wanting her, and forgive herself for the hatred she feels towards herself.
It's a beautiful story about the life of a girl who wasn't supposed to live. It makes you realize that you never know what potential a life could have.
What is even more interesting is during the end credits the actress who plays the birth mother tells how she did have an abortion and how she has carried guilt with her for years. She tells that how during one scene the tears she was crying were real and how she was finally able to forgive herself for everything she has felt for years.
The one thing that I loved about this movie is that even though it was clearly Pro-Life it didn't condem those who had chosen abortion. There was a line from the movie where a character said, "You hate the crime not the criminal." Meaning that we should still love those who hurt us or who choose a wrong path even if we don't agree with that choice.
A beautiful song plays during the end credits that mentioned all the small things that a person experiences in life that make up the bigger picture. I listened to it and thought about all those little things that I have felt and done and how beautiful even my fairly boring regular life is. It makes me wonder why anyone would be selfish enough to choose abortion over giving life. No matter how inconvienient a child may be during your life at that time, you should never let a life be prematurely ended especially when so many couples try to have a child and can't.
Life is beautiful and wonderful and precious. Each person has so much potential and so much that they will do and see and live. I wish that people could see that and stop the whole practice of abortion.
Saturday, June 9, 2012
What We Make of It
"The life of every man is a diary in which he means to
write one story, and writes another; and his humblest hour is when he
compares the volume as it is with what he vowed to make it." -Sir James Matthew Barrie
On occasion I stop and think about my life. I think of the things I've done, the things I haven't done, and the things I wished I'd done. At times I realize what I thought I would do, is so far from what I have actually done. Sometimes I think of the things I have done and marvel that I never thought of them before.
I often ponder if I had known back then what I know now, would things have been different? Of coarse they would. But how would I have known the things that I know now if I hadn't had the experiences back then?
I may not be very old, at twenty-three I certainly can't claim great wisdom. However I can say I have learned a thing or two in the last two decades. The first is this: Life is what we make of it. Be that good or bad. You can plan and hope and dream and work hard, but in the end some things will happen that you did not plan. Now you can either be angry with this or you can learn to accept it graciously.
The second thing I have learned is to not have regrets. I have made choices and done things that hindsight twenty-twenty I would probably not have done. I might have made different choices. If given the chance to go back I probably would have chosen different paths. But had I not made the choices I made I would have not learned the things I have learned, therefore not becoming the person I am today. The person I am is not perfect and not spectacular, but I accept the person I am and do not regret anything that made me this person.
Which leads to my last thing I have learned: Accept the person you are. You may not be the brightest, the most beautiful, the most talented, or the most athletic. But you are you. And as Dr. Seuss once put it, "Today you are you, that is truer then true. There is no one alive who is youer then you!"Be glad you are you. You can always improve what you are, but don't change who you are. It's important to realize that the person you are is far more important then what you wish you could have been. Because the person you are is the person who you are going to be forever, and it's time you realize that you are special in your own unique way. Be proud of what you have accomplished, and don't be afraid to become even better. Just make sure you stay true to who you truly are. Don't lose the real you to the world around you. The world wants us all to be a certain way. But that is petty and small minded of them. What a horrid place this world would be with out all the diversity of it's people.
Life throws us curve balls and we have to learn how to work with what we have. But don't wallow in the lost life you thought you would have, instead appreciate the things that made you the stunning person you are today. Because you are special. When you step out of your house each day and face the sometimes cruel world around you, just remember that you are becoming an even better person with each choice and decision you make.
On occasion I stop and think about my life. I think of the things I've done, the things I haven't done, and the things I wished I'd done. At times I realize what I thought I would do, is so far from what I have actually done. Sometimes I think of the things I have done and marvel that I never thought of them before.
I often ponder if I had known back then what I know now, would things have been different? Of coarse they would. But how would I have known the things that I know now if I hadn't had the experiences back then?
I may not be very old, at twenty-three I certainly can't claim great wisdom. However I can say I have learned a thing or two in the last two decades. The first is this: Life is what we make of it. Be that good or bad. You can plan and hope and dream and work hard, but in the end some things will happen that you did not plan. Now you can either be angry with this or you can learn to accept it graciously.
The second thing I have learned is to not have regrets. I have made choices and done things that hindsight twenty-twenty I would probably not have done. I might have made different choices. If given the chance to go back I probably would have chosen different paths. But had I not made the choices I made I would have not learned the things I have learned, therefore not becoming the person I am today. The person I am is not perfect and not spectacular, but I accept the person I am and do not regret anything that made me this person.
Which leads to my last thing I have learned: Accept the person you are. You may not be the brightest, the most beautiful, the most talented, or the most athletic. But you are you. And as Dr. Seuss once put it, "Today you are you, that is truer then true. There is no one alive who is youer then you!"Be glad you are you. You can always improve what you are, but don't change who you are. It's important to realize that the person you are is far more important then what you wish you could have been. Because the person you are is the person who you are going to be forever, and it's time you realize that you are special in your own unique way. Be proud of what you have accomplished, and don't be afraid to become even better. Just make sure you stay true to who you truly are. Don't lose the real you to the world around you. The world wants us all to be a certain way. But that is petty and small minded of them. What a horrid place this world would be with out all the diversity of it's people.
Life throws us curve balls and we have to learn how to work with what we have. But don't wallow in the lost life you thought you would have, instead appreciate the things that made you the stunning person you are today. Because you are special. When you step out of your house each day and face the sometimes cruel world around you, just remember that you are becoming an even better person with each choice and decision you make.
Wednesday, May 23, 2012
The Magic of Reading
"It is important," the man in the grey suit interrupts. "someone needs
to tell those tales. When the battles are fought and won and lost, when
the pirates find the treasures and the dragons eat their foes for
breakfast with a nice cup of Lapsang souchong, someone needs to tell
their bits of overlapping narrative. There's magic in that. It's in the
listener, and for each and every ear it will be different, and it will
affect them in ways they can never predict. From the mundane to the
profound. You may tell a tale that takes up residence in someone's soul,
becomes their blood and self and purpose. That tale will move them and
drive them and who knows what they might do because of it..."(381)
The above quote was taken from a wonderful book I just finished that is truly a gem. The Night Circus is a book that not only is unique and creative, but magical and mysterious. I am an avid reader. I can always be found with a book on my nightstand and with any free time available most likely I will be curled up with a book. I gravitate more towards the fantasy genre, but I do also have a love for historical fiction, dystopian, romance, and some science fiction.
In our world today I have noticed many of my friends and colleagues who do not read, or if they do it is very little. They spend any extra time at night watching various reality shows or dramas on TV. While I do applaud the writing of some TV shows, a large majority of them are silly, stupid, and quite frankly not worth people's time. TV does not allow an environment for the imagination to grow and develop.
Reading is like a mini-vacation. For an hour or two you can be in a different land fighting a dragon, or a century in the past attending a fancy ball, or perhaps a land in the future fighting for control over an oppressive government. You can be someone else doing things you would never do in your everyday life. Reading gives you endless possibilities.
In books magic is real and tangible. In this latest book I read the author gives you the hint that perhaps magic is real and it is only because we choose not to see it that we believe it is not. This is what I love about reading. To me a story is magical. I am transformed into the character I am reading about and I can witness things that my everyday life would never allow me to see.
For those that know me one of my favorite things is to walk into a book store. The second I enter I am greeted with the smell of new books and in some stores fresh brewed coffee. I love to walk down the isles touching glossy covers and opening books to fresh unread pages. I love turning those pages and scanning the words wondering what exciting new story is contained between the front and back covers. What new world has yet to be explored and new foes to be vanquished. Then after looking at all the new books I want to read I locate the books I have read before. Old friends that I have gone back to year after year. The books where I have memorized entire paragraphs and have favorite chapters that I re-read when I don't have the time to read the entire story. It's a magical experience for me and one that I never tire of.
Thanks to this modern world of technology books are even more available. We have many electronic devices that can hold an entire library. I myself own a Kindle. I love it and take it with me when ever I am traveling. However there is something to be said about the actual physical turning of a page. Many of my favorite books I own in the print form. These books I treasure. They remind me of that first magical time I read that story.
More then anything I want people to know about this world of reading! I want them to feel the wonder and magic that a book can bring! So for one night don't turn on the TV and watch whatever silly show that is on. Instead pick up a book and see what story is contained within the pages. You may be surprised by what you discover! If you need a suggestion of what to read, try The Night Circus. I promise you won't be disappointed!
The above quote was taken from a wonderful book I just finished that is truly a gem. The Night Circus is a book that not only is unique and creative, but magical and mysterious. I am an avid reader. I can always be found with a book on my nightstand and with any free time available most likely I will be curled up with a book. I gravitate more towards the fantasy genre, but I do also have a love for historical fiction, dystopian, romance, and some science fiction.
In our world today I have noticed many of my friends and colleagues who do not read, or if they do it is very little. They spend any extra time at night watching various reality shows or dramas on TV. While I do applaud the writing of some TV shows, a large majority of them are silly, stupid, and quite frankly not worth people's time. TV does not allow an environment for the imagination to grow and develop.
Reading is like a mini-vacation. For an hour or two you can be in a different land fighting a dragon, or a century in the past attending a fancy ball, or perhaps a land in the future fighting for control over an oppressive government. You can be someone else doing things you would never do in your everyday life. Reading gives you endless possibilities.
In books magic is real and tangible. In this latest book I read the author gives you the hint that perhaps magic is real and it is only because we choose not to see it that we believe it is not. This is what I love about reading. To me a story is magical. I am transformed into the character I am reading about and I can witness things that my everyday life would never allow me to see.
For those that know me one of my favorite things is to walk into a book store. The second I enter I am greeted with the smell of new books and in some stores fresh brewed coffee. I love to walk down the isles touching glossy covers and opening books to fresh unread pages. I love turning those pages and scanning the words wondering what exciting new story is contained between the front and back covers. What new world has yet to be explored and new foes to be vanquished. Then after looking at all the new books I want to read I locate the books I have read before. Old friends that I have gone back to year after year. The books where I have memorized entire paragraphs and have favorite chapters that I re-read when I don't have the time to read the entire story. It's a magical experience for me and one that I never tire of.
Thanks to this modern world of technology books are even more available. We have many electronic devices that can hold an entire library. I myself own a Kindle. I love it and take it with me when ever I am traveling. However there is something to be said about the actual physical turning of a page. Many of my favorite books I own in the print form. These books I treasure. They remind me of that first magical time I read that story.
More then anything I want people to know about this world of reading! I want them to feel the wonder and magic that a book can bring! So for one night don't turn on the TV and watch whatever silly show that is on. Instead pick up a book and see what story is contained within the pages. You may be surprised by what you discover! If you need a suggestion of what to read, try The Night Circus. I promise you won't be disappointed!
Sunday, September 11, 2011
9/11 Tenth Anniversary
It's amazing to think that it has been ten years since that fateful day when the world changed for all of us Americans. We awoke to a beautiful September morning only to discover that our world had been turned upside down. Thousands of Americans lost their lives, and even more lost their loved ones. Panic and terror were in everyone's minds. We were full of fear and questions. Worried about what would happen next.
I was twelve at the time. I remember I first heard about the attacks at the bus stop while I was waiting for the school bus to take me to school. I remember sitting in my first class of the day working on a paper only to look up at the TV that was tuned into the news to see the fist tower collapse. All through out the day confusion and fear hung in the air. Very little school work got done and most teachers abandoned their lessons. What a fearful time. I didn't know what was going to happen, I didn't even know if I was safe.
But amidst all the tragedy and fear of that day, there was some good. Remember those months following the attacks? Remember every flag across he country raised to half mast in honor of those victims? Remember all the people who donated time, money, and blood to people they never knew and had never met? Remember the signs placed in front yards with the word "Remember" on them? Do you remember all of us Americans putting aside our differences and standing united? I remember. So as we look back at that tragic day that happened a decade ago, let us remember those men and women who died, but let us also remember our country uniting together. Because this moment in history should not be forgotten, not only for it's tragedy, but also for our country's strength. It's that strength that truly shows what America is. What we are as it's citizens, and that we care for one another. God bless our beautiful country, and God bless America's people.
I was twelve at the time. I remember I first heard about the attacks at the bus stop while I was waiting for the school bus to take me to school. I remember sitting in my first class of the day working on a paper only to look up at the TV that was tuned into the news to see the fist tower collapse. All through out the day confusion and fear hung in the air. Very little school work got done and most teachers abandoned their lessons. What a fearful time. I didn't know what was going to happen, I didn't even know if I was safe.
But amidst all the tragedy and fear of that day, there was some good. Remember those months following the attacks? Remember every flag across he country raised to half mast in honor of those victims? Remember all the people who donated time, money, and blood to people they never knew and had never met? Remember the signs placed in front yards with the word "Remember" on them? Do you remember all of us Americans putting aside our differences and standing united? I remember. So as we look back at that tragic day that happened a decade ago, let us remember those men and women who died, but let us also remember our country uniting together. Because this moment in history should not be forgotten, not only for it's tragedy, but also for our country's strength. It's that strength that truly shows what America is. What we are as it's citizens, and that we care for one another. God bless our beautiful country, and God bless America's people.
Thursday, February 17, 2011
My New Fave Lee MacDougall!
Below I have posted the newest song by my favorite new artist! Lee MacDougall is from England and is in the beginning of his career as a singer/songwriter. I stumbled on to his songs one day and have since been blown away by his voice and music style. Three of his songs are available on itunes. If you like the song below check out the other three on itunes!
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